So I am in Sweden still and today I met the Source yep you read correctly I met Papa Stellan funny thing is I’ve been (trying) to cleanses myslef and trying to reboot and start again without Alexander Skarsgård. Man I just don’t have anymore CANS to keep going. UGH so anyways been here now a few days and all is well Sweden has always been more than good to me. I have nothing but good things to say about it’s people and the weather as always been sunny and warm and when I go anywhere that is what is most important to me.
So I am sure that most of you notice that tis blog as been on lockdown. I was going to delete it right away but I had stuff to finish before tis trip and I was going to do it when I got back home. But hey lookie here I guess the Universe does know more than I do and it was waiting for Papa Stellan to show up not a bad way to end the show. Y’all know how I feel about the Skarsgårds. I LOVE them all if I could collect them like Pokemons I would. I would especially the the one that fucks with my devotions the most Alexander Skarsgård love him the most at least I thought so will explain in a bit.
This is kinda sorta a good bye in a way seems fitting that it close with the lead, leader of the pack. So as I said since day one coming to tis country every single person that I have greeted or come in contact with as been nothing but ever so kind and friendly to me. I got nothing but LOVE from everyone and I gave it back full too. The weather, the food, the people as been really great. I made many friends and many strangers that has become friends had sexy moments and eye balling from Swedish males. Have me some stories but here is one for the road maybe it’s my perfume the sight of my legs (it summer so there are lots of legs shown in Stockholm) or I’m just giving off approach me , who knows, I did come with the intention to move on via another handsome swede but that is Not going so well as I would hope, I am cockblocking myself. Still adore that SOB known as Alexander (but the stories had enough of those,Tack!) but okay working on not cockblocking myself got me a couple of days to go. Went into tis store saw something I liked not the dude something esle,but he decided to give it a go fair enough fair game and all heard what he had to say pretty much picked up his game plan. Ask him do you have a GF? kinda sort of he says there is nothing wrong with flirty he says. No there isn’t I said but let me stop you there I don’t mess with other people stuff. We could have kaffe he says. I replied do I look like I play second fiddle to you. Confused. So I clarified I share alot of things would give you my skirt if you needed it more but I don’t share BFs don’t play second so don’t waste your/mine. But, he says. End of disccussion I say. Have a goood one, you’re cute but not that cute.
It goes shit goes against my religion, don’t do seconds man unless it’s a good meal or the sexyy times yeah, points for trying tho dude But I don’t play on that level. So anyways I have been having a great time, been on cool boat with friends when the weather was fucking awesome. Been to new friends home for dinner and cocktails, people have been good to me, people like to adopt me into their families maybe I give off a fragile presence. Some says I am sweet and very nice. Which ever it is I always make friends. No matter where I go, I love that. Blue’s mom adopted me as well I get mother when she is here and she worries and stays up when I go out and stay late, she wants to see if I am alive and nothing happened to me. Sweet huh?! God I love her so much she reminds me of my mom tho. She is funny as hell and she is great fun to be around.
Now back to today, So I was just going to fade like the dust in the wind. OH BTW FUCK YOU VERY MUCH UNIVERSE. NO REALLY FUCK YOU VERY MUCH. THE MIND FUCKS I CAN’T DEAL.
So I rented Melancholia last week and I watched it and laughed at the Stellan moments and today there was Stellan at Kvarnern with Gudrun, man I am such a fan of hers. Christ will say why in a bit. Woke up to a glorious sunny day, so it great to go touring which I did by myslef, then I stop by Kvarnern to get something to drink and take a sit and just as I was walking up to the bar there was Fucking Stellan Skarsgård sitting there minding his own god damn business. I adore Stellan and I wanted to meet him and chat to him and cook dinner and all that good stuff but Lawd I saw him and the creeper in me came the fuck out. (mildly) I fan girled inside my shit was still cool tho but I creep meaning I took a table where I could see and hear him. (yes he spoke swedish, no I didn’t care I still try to listen. ) I sat down got my shit together, then made my approach.
Me: Excuse me are you Stellan Skarsgård (please I knew that and his birthdate and the names of his chirruns) But still must not be Creeper Stan at first. haha.
Papa Stellan: Yes I am. (smile broadly)
Me: would you mind taking a pic with me.?
Papa Stellan: No! (gets up and makes his way to me ,, turns to Skarsgard relation and ask to take pics) Dude takes camera Stellan is next to me, embrace me, me under Stellan armpit like a rented a room , starts directing us where to stand, me and Papa S moves around like it’s a swedish photshoot all the time I still in his embrace/armpit. Dude says smile me gives biggest smile in the world I think, Stellan too then I ask for another pic, dude clicks wrong button goes back to settings and Alexander background. Dude: Hey that’s Alex she has a pics of Alex . Me: to self Lawd dude why you calling me out infront of Stellan man, to self be cool stay cool .. Yeah I am a fan of your Son. Papa S haves no fucks to give he says aah nice.. Me follows suit thanks for the photo shakes his hand goes back to seat. Check pics they are awesome. Stellan gave the hips, Papa Stellan is a sexy Motherfucker if I was into older men he would do it for me but I am not, he can be my dad tho, putting that out here.
Took out my viking book out bag start pretending to read while listening to Papa S talk to Gudrun. drink my cola watch Skarsgårds live their lives infront of me. Inner voice scream go talk to him further. me to slef tisis how stalkers are born, lawd don’t be a creeper and scare these people. Stellan goes to bathroom comes back hope he washed his hands, order more beer talk to other Skarsgårds about I don’t know. There was like two males and a young girl and Gudrun I have seen them all before. Anyways fast forward turn page of book there was a map with Sodermalm on it and I said okay that’s a sign I am going to ask him to sign my book. So I got up, my shit was still cool tho, but I swear Stellan brings out my fucking fan girl in me. I think he is the shit. Really! Truly the bees knees. He is a fucking sexy cool motherfucking Kat in real life man shit was fuucking surreal I didn’t CAN’T.
So I interrupted again and Stellan was uber cool and fucking nice as shit to me said no problem ask my name I spelled it for him he pronounced it and said that a Beautiful name and I said Thank you. He sign it TO name from is autograph. I said that I bought Melancholia DVD but I don’t have it here but I have the rental which I have to give back so that sucks but he signed my viking book so glory be all is right with the world. (not really but ok) he asked if I like it and then we conversated. I shit you not, I spoke to him about films, Lars, Hitler, Lars Cannes oops and why he hates women. No kidding we spoke for quite a bit so much so that ask if it was okay to sit down at his table he said sure they are about to roll out Gudrun but I could sit down and conversate further. Gudrun was looking and smiling at me the whole time I was facing her. We talked about his career his first English movie his experience in the States and acting, he cursed I loved it we talked about Lars Porno flick coming up. I laughed louder inside. I said I will see the hardcore one ask when it is coming out next year at Cannes he said. Great. You know in 1930s Stellan says I look at him I am not that old Stellan not even my mama was born yet and the sexy time which was my creation was not even in the clouds of though. He smiled then he soke about Religon or the lack there of ,Swedish and Pagans. Why swedish movies are allergic to english subtitle, it was great. I fucking LOVE him. I do he should adopt me I would cook dinner, if Alexander doesn’t want to be my BFF forever Stellan will. Papa Stellan pretty lived up to my experience in my head all was missing is my glass of wine which I would drink for hours in his kitchen and me helping with dinner or just eating.
So I excused myslef when Stellan took a breath, I didn’t want to overstay my welcome. But Stellan is a talker that’s for sure. So I went back to my seat and shortly after. Gudrun starts rolling herself out and everyone is getting up. Stellan is tall but Alex is taller. Now by my fucking surprise Gudrun looks directly at me and smile a nice sweet smile my way. I smiled back and said Hey. She rolls over to me she says your pretty. Me inside OMG dead. be cool, stay cool these Skarsgård are trying to make me loose my shit. Thanks! What’s your name? (Please I know it, I know her son/grandkids name and films and I have seen her many times and I am a fan.) She says Gudrun it means old woman in Swedish. I laughed I shake her hand, she shake mines back, good handshake too, she is smiling still and I said you look fine and fit to me. Can you walk without the chair at home, she said No since the last four years she has been in it. I said oh. (her roller wanted to roll her away but she was not having iit we were conversating I was conversating with Gudrun,shit man I was not prepared) Then I realized I am talking in English and I was like your English is excellent I didn’t know older Swedes spoke English so well. Yes we do, she said, the younger ones even better . I was already on a Stellan high, he knock Alex off best meet ever and then Gurun kick everyones asses is the superstar of it all. There they were Skarsgårds at my table jesus was NOT fucking prepared but my shit was cool and I didn’t freak but just as I was talking to Gudrun further while Stellan and everyone esle waited for her to finish speaking fucking Fares, Fares come up to my table too and to Stellan and I am like what the fuck is this. Y’all trying to kill me today. I am like if My and Alexander turn up and I am going to start drinking hard man. Tis some mindfuck on a Monday.
He greeted Stellan then he greeted Gudrun and hugged her, she hugged him back he said something then I said okay have a good day. It was nice to meet you. They all roll off and I sitting there like thank the lawd I was already seated. What the fuck just happened. So I turned around and watched them. They chatted and then they went their separate ways. Fares walked over to Medis next to Kvarnern to his friends two girls and a guy and yes guys face was familar too I am sure I have seen him with Alex somewhere.
Then lo and behold fucking Tariek shows up moments later I am like Jesus take the fucking wheel roll it into next week. What is tis mindfuck. All tis time I am like if Alex pops up i am going to have to order couple of strong drinks but he didn’t turn up. Motherfukcer I would have jumped him. No now I am friends watching and being a creeper and taking photos. I wonder if I should say hey to Fares and take a pic but I was like CAN’T save something for tomorrow. I got me a couple more days. I don’t know where Alexander Skarsgård but he wasn’t at Soder Motherfucker I would have jumped him. (what. I just had a major Skarsgård moment my shit is fucking weak again.) I love these people but I want Gudrun to adopt she can be my swedish granny. She seems to like me, she didn’t have to stop she made contact, now I need to meet her again and get a pic of us together print it on a Tshirt and wear around my house, because she scored major in my book now. If none of the Skarsgårds wants to be or if I had to choose I would choose her. She is so fucking awesome and so nice she’s what I thought she was in my head too. Like I was in some alter universe and shit. I CAN’T man but tis was an awesome day. I will tell my grandkids one day while they are rolling me out too. Good times. Good people LOVE THE SKARSGÅRDS ALL OF THEM THEY SHOULD ADOPT MY ASS SERIOUSLY.
Tis is great last post. Alexander wouldn’t be mine at least I might get Gudrun in the long run I can deal with that and I can roll her out if she wants, I am no good at the drinking, I don’t have the viking blood. I hope she lives forever truly, she’s great. I need a pic of us together. I need it as a parting gift I will be very happy with that. Since Alexander doesn’t want to be the father of my chirruns and sexy times bed,couch and car partner.
Then some time passed Gudrun rolls pass me and shortly after so did Papa Stellan he was coming from the supermarket, He had groceries and that means he was going to make something for dinner that I wouldn’t be helping with Sad fucking face. tis is when it pleases me that I am not that far gone. Because Lawd if my shit was lost I would have followed him home and invite myself in and ruin it. Haha I really wanted to tho.
PS Papa Stellan said Megan willl have the baby soon, shortly. I congratulated and ask if he knew what it was and wanted to tell he said he didn’t know. I am hoping it is a girl. She would be very pretty.
So that’s my story it would be much better if I was having the sexy times repeatedly with Alexander Skrasgård but he doesn’t want to be the father of my chirruns so yeah. What can you do? Fall more in love with Gudrun. I am going to print a Tshirt and wear it around the house. Yep I am huge fan of hers now more than I was before.